Monday, November 22, 2010

Time Insurance

Time insurance . . . I need time insurance!

They have insurance for everything else that's precious:  Health Insurance, Life Insurance, Car Insurance, Homeowner's Insurance, Travel Insurance . . .

Well what about time insurance? I mean it!

Honey, I don't know about you; but my time is valuable. And I'm tired of it being abused, so I want it insured.

When someone makes an appointment at my office and shows up an hour late or not at all, I want to be compensated for my time. If I cancelled other important business with this guy, and lost out on a whole lot of money, I should be able to put in a claim against my policy. I need time insurance!

When I go to the doctor's office and he keeps me waiting for three hours and then is called away for an emergency C-section I'm pissed, but I shouldn't be angry at some poor suffering woman who's gone through 23 hours of hard labor -- and knowing I'm going to get an insurance settlement will guarantee I won't. I need time insurance!

If I'm standing on line for concert tickets, or to get the newest I-phone, and I wait in rain, sleet, or snow . . . only to get to the counter just as my desired item is sold-out, I want to be able to call my insurance agent as soon as I get home and know there will soon be a check in the mail. I need time insurance!

When I call to get information about my computer software product and the call gets routed to a call-center in India and I then waste 45 minutes to talking to some guy named Bob with an accent so thick I can't understand what he's saying and I've missed four important calls because I didn't want to click over and risk losing Bob and having to start all over again -- well, I want to put in my claim if Bob turns out to be a dunce who doesn't know the difference between Microsoft Word and Microsoft Excel. I need time insurance!

I don't think this is too much too ask!

Citizens of the world rise up and take action! We've all suffered enough of these time abuses, we need insurance against them. If we all rose up and forced insurance companies to insure our time, I bet they’d find out a way to make people keep their appointments, women from needing C-sections, concerts from selling out, and our jobs being shipped to the Far East. They investigate and put a stop to everything else. Why not let them put a stop to time abuse? We need time insurance

Then maybe I could get a check for the time I wasted writing this blog post. Or maybe you could get a check for the time you took to read it.

Hmmm . . . time insurance doesn’t sound too stupid right now, does it?

You need time insurance!

No comments: